Views & Reviews From Writer Steve Miller
Formerly Reviews and Stuff at Rotten Tomatoes, 2005 - 2009.

Currently Showing at Cinema Steve

Friday, March 30, 2012

A great reason to buy Katy Perry's new single

If a supporter of the morons in the Occupy [Insert Random Location Here] Movement is calling for a boycott of Katy Perry's new single, it seems like the perfect reason to BUY it.

Katy Perry: Offending Occupy [Insert Random Location Here] Supporters since 2012

If you are as offended by Naomi Wolf's disdain for free expression, and for those who protect her right to be an obnoxious bitch, I don't recommend you boycott her; only idiots who support "movements" like Occupy [Insert Random Location Here] call for boycotts. Instead, I suggest you buy a copy of Katy Perry's "Part of Me" single.

Get "Part Of Me" from in MP3 format by clicking here.

And watch the horrifyingly offensive video right here at Cinema Steve!

(By the way, I am such a big fan of Katy Perry that I had to a) look up the spelling of her name, and b) correct the title of the song when I first referenced it in a draft of this post--the song is NOT titled "All of Me" like I initially wrote. In other words, I am NOT a fan of Katy Perry, and I wouldn't be giving her coverage and free advertising if some censorship-happy cow hadn't started calling for a boycott. I wonder how it will work out for her?)

Sunday, March 25, 2012

A public service announcement....

When you've got your Sarah Fluke-endorsed birth control, please consider the following:

Brought to you by The Beards and this station.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Tectonic Tuesday: Simone Farrow

In April of 2010, the Imam of Imams, the man so wise that someday even the Prophet Mohammad (may peas be upon him) will study at his feet, revealed to the world the TRUE cause of earthquakes: "Many women who do not dress modestly ... lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases earthquakes," Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi (known as Slammy to his friends) told worshipers and the Iranian media.

But the world did not heed his warning. Immodest women are still causing the earth to tremble and crack because of their wicked ways. Most recently, Simone Farrow has brought destruction to the hapless people of this planet, so I once again offer tangible proof of Slammy Sedighi's Allah-inspired wisdom and divine message of warning.

Twentieth Case Study: Simone Farrow

Simone Farrow (aka Simone Starr and Mingximengnuo Starr) was the face (and body) of Ed Hardy bikinis during the early 2000s. The company stopped using her in 2006, but in July of that year, the multitude of pictures and videos of her flaunting herself caused a 7.7 earthquake and tsunami near the island of Java that killed some 700 people and injured more than 9,000.

But ending her relationship with the bikini company did not make Farrow any less dangerous. Her near-nakedness remained on display in places like Penthouse Magazine, FHM Magazine, and numerous other places who trade on the twisted ways of immodest women and play with the safety of the world on a regular basis. And as the years went by, Farrow started adding more tattoos to her body, making her not only an immodest women, but an immodest women who violated divine commandments by marking her body! There can be little question that she can be held responsible for the 2008 Sichuan earthquake that killed over 68,000 people in China.

Farrow, however, was a destructive force on another level. As her modeling career faded, she is alleged to have transitioned into the role of drug kingpin, becoming the world's least-clad meth-dealer and shipping drugs mixed with bath salts from her Hollywood home to the far corners of the Earth. In 2009, the DEA moved in to arrest her, and she went on the lam, adding 19 more aliases to her list of names. She has been arrested twice this year in Australia, once in February (after which she promptly skipped bail), and again yesterday.

Farrow's most recent arrest has brought a flood of pictures of her unclothed body back to the internet and in the pages of newspapers. It should come as no surprise that, just as the Imam of Imams warned us, a powerful, prolonged earthquake shook southern Mexico today, Tuesday March 20.

The cost in human life of this latest disaster caused by the immodesty of Simone Farrow has yet to be determined... but it will undoubtedly make the lives ruined by any meth she may or may not have distributed seem insignificant.

When will the world listen to the warnings of Slammy Sedighi?! When with manufactures of weapons of mass destruction like Ed Hardy bikinis and Penthouse Magazine be treated like the threats to all of humanity that they are?! And when will women stop flaunting themselves and endangering all of us on Planet Earth?!

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Jean Giraud dead at 73

Artist Jean "Moebius" Giraud has succumbed to illness at the age of 73.

Giraud was perhaps most famous for drawing sci-fi series like "The Inkal" and "The Airtight Garage", but I was most fond of his work on the "Blueberry" graphic novels. They remain some of the greatest western comics to ever be published.

Even people who don't know who he was have probably had their lives influenced by his artwork, as he also worked as a concept artist on many widely known sci-fi and fantasy movies, including "Willow", "Alien", and "Tron".

Friday, March 2, 2012

Jailbird Parade: Skinhead moron knocked cold by boxing champ

Sometimes, it's okay to laugh at the misfortune of others... especially when it's an idiot who isn't half as tough as he likes to think he is. Read about Daren Abbey, White Supremeist and Grade-A idiot, by clicking here. But here's a highlight:

Abbey, a self-proclaimed skinhead who sports several neo-Nazi tatoos, got knocked out with one punch by the black man during the July 3 incident. Abbey later told officials that he felt he had been "hit by a brick." Abbey apparently was unaware of the writing on the back of the black man's T-shirt: "Spokane Boxing Club Champion."

Daren Abbey: It's okay to laugh at his misfortune.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Bad news, good news....

The day started out with the sad news that one of the true modern-day champions of free speech, website operator and author Andrew Breitbart, collapsed last night and passed away early Monday morning of an as-of-this-writing unknown cause. Love his work or hate it--me, I'm a big fan of employee and Big Hollywood editor John Nolte, and an admirer of what Breitbart accomplished over all. His death is a great loss for those of us who despise speech codes, political correctness, and the media serving the bidding of the White House and other government institutions instead of fulfilling its role as watchdog. (That's not to say Breitbart is perfect... but his outlets didn't pretend to be hard news, unlike what you get from ABC. ABC who wants us to believe they do unbiased reporting with a group of random Americans in a townhall broadcast from the White House.)

The GOOD NEWS is that televison, the opiate of the masses with ease our pain and loss. PSYCH returns to the USA Network tonight, March 1, with new episodes!