Views & Reviews From Writer Steve Miller
Formerly Reviews and Stuff at Rotten Tomatoes, 2005 - 2009.

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Thursday, March 10, 2011

Go see 'Rango' to piss off anti-smoking Nazis

Animated movie "Rango" is tops at the box office, so I assume it's a fun film. But that's not why I'm going to carve out the time to see it.

Rango. With a toothpick, not a cigarette.
Because I care about the children.
It's got the anti-smoking Nazis all worked up. They are running around, shrieking, tearing their hair out, and beating their chests. Because iguanas and other animals are shown smoking cigarettes. Click here to read all about it.

This is film that needs to be #1 at the box office for a long, long time. The hysterical antics of sanctimonious assholes who want force their Puritanical values on others using the excuse that it's "for the children" will be be even more fun to watch and comment on than "Rango".

Hey, maybe some of them will have heart attacks or strokes because they're so hepped up. Or maybe get so dispondant over smoking talking cartoon animals they'll put themselves out of our misery and commit suicide. Maybe then we'll have studies that show that being an anti-Smoking Nazi is bad for your health?

Maybe I can help speed things along....

For the record, I've smoked two cigarettes and taken three puffs on cigars my entire life. I have watched who-knows-how-many movies with characters smoking like chimneys, and I thought Nick Fury was one on the coolest comic book characters when I was a kid. And I still don't smoke.

I also don't drive fast, rob banks, shoot people, or go on killing sprees wearing funny masks and coveralls.

Gosh... I wonder if encouraging PARENTING is what the anti-smoking morons should focus their efforts on, if they're going to insist on getting in other people's business.


  1. you smoked 2 cigarettes and 3 puffs of a cigar. OK. But how much pot did you do?

  2. None. My laziness and derangements are come by naturally.... no need for drugs here!

  3. I thought you were a major cigar man, from your profile picture.
    Nothing in the world could induce me to watch any vile-looking modern cartoon, but I share your joy that this has pissed off the goose-steppers.
    Have you watched Ghostbusters lately? They all smoke like burning haystacks, all the way through. Oh, it's bliss!

  4. Nah... I was just holding the cigar for the picture. It WAS actually offered for me to smoke, but I just took a couple of puffs and handed it off to a friend. I will say this: It was a far better tasting cigar than the one I had years ago. I now understand why people pay so much for certain brands.

    It's been a while since I've seen Ghostbusters, but maybe I need to check it out. Perhaps even review it coincide with some "Smokeout Day" in the future. :)

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