Views & Reviews From Writer Steve Miller
Formerly Reviews and Stuff at Rotten Tomatoes, 2005 - 2009.

Currently Showing at Cinema Steve

Thursday, October 17, 2013

'Holy Safari' with O.J. Simpson, coming soon

Like Job, he's long suffering. Like Mohammed the Prophet, he's a bloody-handed murderer. Like Baby Jesus, he will be delivered unto the world in December... because that's when he gets out of prison for armed robbery and kidnapping.

I'm talking about O.J. Simpson -- and he is hoping to star in a new religious show called "Holy Safari," who, according to his publicist Norm Pardo, is perfect for a show like this.

"He’s always been religious inside [...],’ Mr. Pardo said. "He helps people who can't find their way."

Simpson's especially good at personally helping people on their way to Heaven.

If the promotional art is any indication, "Holy Safari" is going to be shockingly bad. *I* could have Photoshopped a better image. Hell, I make better promotional images on a regular basis for NUELOW Games if I do say so myself.

You can read all about Norm Pardo's fantasies regarding the future greatest wandering holy man since Jesus by clicking here. (For another display of cheap half-assedness, check out the web address where the promo page for the show can be found.)

There's also this article in the Daily Mail Online about O.J. Simpson's latest excursion into obnoxiousness. Does anyone but Norm Pardo actually think the Pope will grant an interview to a thug who got away with murder and who has shown no remorse whatsoever. One might even say that he has been the opposite of remorseful.

Then again, when one is a holy man--a Prophet even--one doesn't have to be remorseful.